16 December 2012

home sweet home

It was 6 in the evening. I try to squeeze out of the traffic jam and rush to get my son. 10 minutes after, there he is, enjoying himself in fresh splashing bath tub. “Your son fought with Ecah. He knock her head with tv remote”. “Oh! So how was she?” I’m not that surprise actually. “Trauma..” says aunty Moon, who look after my son when I am at college.

6.50pm: I reach home. The day is getting dark. I quickly run to the kitchen to prepare dinner. I start searching from my fridge and there was only a cucumber and few pieces of salted fish. So, menu for tonight is salted fish salad. My recipe is cook without recipe. Yet, no one ever complained.

Having dinner with 1 year old Harris is a challenge even he is in the baby seat. When he start kicking the table, I get him out and….play time! It already ten when the boy get into sleep. And I try to continue my dinner. Dinner at ten? Yes. Why not. And a cup of coffee to help me stay up for assignments. Plus homework. Assignment and homework is different isn’t it? Yes it is. But assignment is more prior since we are assessed through assignment. Home work is extra work for me. But still have to be done no matter what. What must have home work? That’s the system. Malaysian’s system that need me to do bunch of assignments and homework by neglecting the proper time frame. Meaning, the system want me to finish up all the assignment without considering the quality. Why I said so? Because the system said so. We have one whole semester full with assignments and at the same time we need to ensure our selves are prepare for the exam. How can I? I even struggle to finish those assignments, and the system want me to study for exam? Yes you must or the system will eliminate you from the system.

After two hours working for the assignments, my baby cry. Time for milk. Every two hours and every one hour from four to six. It take about half an hour to breastfeed the baby. Then I continue with the assignments. I have about for hours before need to get to the kitchen to prepare porridge for Harris and get myself ready for college at six every morning. I do as what is relevant to my ‘ding dong’ brain. Come on, I haven’t get my sleep. It is normal. That why I keep waiting for Saturday because that’s the only day I sleep well and get the feeling to be human. Due to this, I spend amounts of my little pocket money for medicine. We are only human, even we are doing things none stop like an angle.

Fifteen minutes pass four. I am rushing to finish my last line of very poor quality assignment when I heard something in front of my house. People do work at this time. During the full moon. Here the robbery case is quite often heard. It’s a non-local target area to get extra income. I have once woke up at night and saw someone walking along the roof after doing job and someone’s house, and few more someone chasing for him. Pheww…luckily that someone not doing job at my house. There are few trials but they failed to get in, that’s why I am lucky.

I slowly get myself as close as I can to the sliding door to have a look of what going on in front of the house. Who is that searching things in my recycle container at the car porch? Its Luna, my neighbour’s pet. She must be very hungry. Since Puan Mariam pass away, the cat survive on its own. i quickly get the Friskies for her.

At six, everything done. And another hectic day to go through. The homework will be continue once I reach college. The narrative writing that only few more of us haven’t pass up. The lecturers are human. But do they that human we don’t know. So better do what they asked for.

It easier to satisfied our Lord then the humans. Especially lectures and parents. Back to back, it is the system.

the end.



12 December 2012

hormon cikedukedu

Peh,rasanya macam lama sangat tak update blog yang merapu ni. Hi hi hi..
Hari ni semangat aku berkobar-kobar nak ke tempat kerja. Semangat yang lain dari hari-hari sebelum ni. Betapa awalnya aku bangun, betapa constant nya aku memandu dan betapa patuhnya aku pada undang-undang jalan raya(yang mana sebelum ni aku cukup hilang sabar bila ada kete lain ajak aku race kat highway)..ha ha ha..
Dan, hari ini bukanlah hari yang istimewa sangat pun tapi aku tak tahu kenapa aku rasa cukup bersemangat untuk melangkah ke tempat kerja.dan aku masih tertanya-tanya mungkinkah semangat ini tadi kian membara apabila melihat wajah isteri dan anakanda yang sedang nyenyak tidur membuatkan satu perasaan rasa tanggungjawab yang maha berat terpikul atas bahu lalu membuatkan paras hormon cikedukedu aku meningkat ke tahap yang membataskan aura seorang adiwira bernama ironman.
Dalam perjalanan ke office tadi, aku terasa bagai banyak pasang mata memandang aku. Mungkin perasaan aku aje sebab untuk pertama kalinya aku melangkah di waktu pagi untuk pergi kerja dengan memakai selipar sebelah lain dan sebelah lagi selipar lain. Tapi itu bukan masalah besar bagi aku sebab sebelum ni aku pernah menghadapi saat yang paling tak best daripada memakai selipar lain-lain sebelah ni.hu hu hu.
Berbalik kepada semangat berkobar-kobar nak dating ke tempat kerja hari ni, kawan aku kata kalau pergi ke suatu tempat dengan semangat berkobar-kobar disusuli dengan keyakinan yang jitu-jitu gitu segala kerja tu akan mendatangkan hasil. Ini yang tengah aku buat sekarang ni. Tapi aku tak tahulah nanti, namun sedikit sebanyak jika difikirkan secara psychology aku tak ada sifat menyembunyi atau hipokrit tentang diri aku, itulah yang benar-benar aku harapkan.
Sampai kat office agak awal dari biasa. Buka je pintu office aku tengok office aku terang benderang dengan cahaya lampu pendarflour PHILIPS 16W menerjah ke alam mata. Semangat aku makin menebal, makin kuat rasanya hati ni nak bekerja dan terus menabur jasa kepada rakyat.
Dengan senyuman yang lebar, aku switch ON komputer..aku sabar menanti komputer aku beroperasi. Aku tengok pada desktop komputer tertera wajah anakanda, pergghhh..makin bersemangat aku nak mencari rezeki demi keluarga yang tercinta. Lalu aku gerakkan mouse ke kiri dan ke kanan mencari browser google chrome pada desktop lalu aku klik dengan penuh keyakinan. KLIk!KLIK!
Browser google chrome sedang beroperasi..aku tunggu…aku tunggu dengan penuh rasa hormat dan bersemangat…
Kini dah hampir 15 minit aku tunggu tapi browser google masih lagi mencari..aku masih lagi tersenyum tapi dah tak Nampak gigi macam awal-awal tadi. Setengah jam berlalu, dari google aku klik pulak ke internet explorer, hasil natijahnya tetap sama. Loading lama…..kesabaran aku mula teruji, senyuman aku yang meleret tadi dah bertukar menjadi senyuman mencirit. Semangat aku yang tadinya berkobar-kobar dah mula jadi suam-suam gebar.
Aku mula gelisah, aku mula pasrah kerana apa yang harapkan, apa yang aku rancangkan untuk kerja hari ni semuanya terbantut. Daripada ayat-ayat pujian perrrgghhhh kini apa yang keluar dari mulut aku cuma eerrgghhhhhh..

“krrriiingggg…krrringggg….”,telefon pejabat aku berdering



“nan, internet tak boleh masuk kan..?”, suara seorang sahabat dari tingkat 29.

“la ye ker internet tak leh masuk?adoooiiii…”, aku mengeluh sebab dari tadi aku try-try tak boleh launch internet.

“hoh laaa….moh naik tingkat 29 ni, main PS2 PES 2012.. dok depan komputer bukan boleh buat kerja pun..meh laa..ramai dah tunggu ko ni….”,ayat pancing dari dia nak ajak bertarung.

Kini aku mula kembali bersemangat. Bukan semangat nak bekerja tapi aku makin bersemangat nak main PS2 game bola sepak . Semoga perjuangan aku hari ni diberkati..amin… hi hi hi